Of Dresses and Pettiness

A FF Dress Code?
Delhi was still beastly cold and though I had tried to wear saris alternately with salwar suits, I quickly reverted to my pant suits. Another reason for ditching saris entirely for office was that I kept tearing the edge under the chairs with their wheels. I could never remember to gather my sari daintily as other sari-clad women apparently do! Only a few days passed when our group secretary came to me and told me of the dress code for women that prescribed only saris. 'Who said so? I have not seen any such order', I demanded.
' No, there is nothing in writing, but the unwritten rule is that we should be in national dress'.
I was indignant. 'if men can wear western attire, why not we? You are mostly Punjabis, you should all say your national dress is a salwar suit and insist on wearing it. Let me see if anyone objects; did they hire me for my dress or my professional skills?'
Needless to say, nobody objected and I continued wearing whatever I liked. Months later, on one of the few days that I wore a sari [probably because I was going to some function], Dr.Bose, the adminiatrative director, remarked that saris suited me best, and I should always wear that. I retorted, 'Dr.Bose, you look so grand in your Bengali style dhothi. Why don't you wear that daily and I will wear a sari'. He had to laugh and give up.
When I joined UNICEF a couple of years later, I wore saris when attending a meeting or going over to the government offices and the pants or salwar suits otherwise. I switched over completely to salwar suits and pants when I left for Ethiopia. Saris were reserved for evenings and functions. Finally, I stuck to salwar suits, finding them more comfortable than the pant suits especially as I had put on weight!
All this might seem strange today, when even many female govt. officers wear the salwar suit and down the deep south, so removed from the home of this dress, the younger generation is wearing nothing else. But in those days, only a few of us dared violate the unwritten dress code.To this day, I do not wear a sari to work except very rarely; in addition to the salwar suit, I have gone to work in other types of dresses too. Lungis patterned after the South-East Asian sarong outfits became the rage in Delhi a few years later and I got one. While posted in Ethiopia, any kaftan or boubou from one of the African countries was quite acceptable and in New York even more so, in the UNICEF [or any UN organisation] mileu. The UN in fact abounded in the most glorious and riotous national dresses from all over the world, and I am not speaking only about the women. The most resplendent of us all was Djibril D., from Senegal, who almost invariably donned his clan boubou with the typical elaborate embroidered tunic and he was a sight to make anyone's head turn! I used to tease him saying he was a peacock.

Camaraderie among the GCP staff
We were a friendly and vibrant lot avid to prove that our project approach was correct. Except for me, the rest of the professionals were men. One day, Prodipto got upset over some lacuna in the team's non-responsiveness to some question, and upon my piping up, said testily, 'Padmini is the only man in the team!'. Did I flare up! He, and the others too, was astonished that I had taken umbrage at what was in their eyes a great compliment. Even after I explained that such a remark implied that no normal woman was capable of the point I made, so the only apt comparision was with a man, I do not think the logic sank into their heads.

Only one incident marred this camaraderie. As we went into '72, our project staff, except the directors, got involved in an unsavoury incident of our own making. For some reason, some of us Indians took offence to what one of the three Americans in the group said, and smarting at the apparent insult, we decided to write him a strong note. This came to the notice of the project directors who let us know we were silly to act like this, and like a bucket of cold water, this reaction as well his genuine bewilderment at being targeted by this baying pack of colleagues, brought us to our senses. Luckily, he was magnanimous enough to forget the incident, and we all became friends again. For me, it was the third time that I had got into actions that left a bad taste in my mouth afterwards, and I made a fresh resolve that I would never again fall into such a mire again! This has been one resolution well kept.


More Growth Centre Incidents
One day Nayan, one of my colleagues came up to me aked if I would accompany him, “ I got my licence today” he aded. 'Well, if you have your licence, why do you want me to come with you?' I queried? He sheepishly returned, ' You know how it is, Padmini. I just managed to get my licence!' 'Shame on you, Nayan, you don't deserve to be helped. Go and run over a few people!'
of course I relented, phoned Ramu to come pick me up at his house rather than the office and set out with Nayan. Was my heart in my mouth all the time! Midway I just could not stand it any more, and firmly told him to move over and drove the rest of the way myself. I told him he better practice in a non-peak hour and in a quiet area, preferably an empty maidan near his home before braving the rush hour traffic or rather imposing his zig-zaging on all who had the misfortune to encounter him on the road.
Whether he followed my advice or not, I guess he did improve as he did live till much later and there was no report of his knocking down others. Even now many get away with their driving school managing their licence without a full test by the licensing authority.